it nice to be appreciated....the dormant should become active!

I've recently wrote to my ex bosses requesting for a reference letter... this is the first one that came back, co incidentally from the first boss i worked for... :)
as i read it... i started to recollect times of me as a lil girl, starting out. Full of bash, filled with passion, determination to CHEONG, to just do it, regardless... fearless and doubtless, and of cos, the many ppl tt stood by me, supported me to make my journey a smooth and better one....

- the times when james swee jus left me to run his event, with no doubt and not even feeling the requirement to be there...

- the times where cornelia said if i approve it she will cos she knows im more anal than she is

- the times where me and jo y toast each other cos it was team work tt we made things work

- the times where jo wong will call and give me a brief on the phone... and... cheekily say... its for tml u know...

- the times where kristen will throw me his credit card and say, you will need it, and left for shanghai

- the times where i worked 48hours non stop to launch party time

- the times where we ALL HAD fun....

- the times where my clients were shocked to know tt im barely 21

- the sleazy party we did

- me bashing into orchard tower to bcos of a 'request to find beautiful Thai speaking girls"

- The times where the sales rep almost fought with the pimp... aha
- the victory cheer and me downing big bottles of barons.....

* it was so much fun, so much enthusiasm.... it nice when ppl believe in you... and allow u to take ownership... it makes u move forward with such an energy tt DRIVES u...

like i always believe, its mind over body....

there will always of cos be the ppl who were envious, who were green who were upset when u were doing ok.... sign....

ppl talk abt first love, having the feeling back again, I prayed that as i continue to strive towards the light, my energy will be like when i first started, but coated with wisdom and discernment...

i recall once a boss ever tole me tt im so full of energy, zest like a molecule...
i wished i can keep tt momentum aways but being weary and careful to not burnt out as i continue to move towards the light

ok.. here the letter tt got me thinking....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To Whom It May Concern,

REFERENCE LETTER FOR SCHIZOGEN

schizogen was employed with XXXXX as Assistant Account Manager from XXXX, thereafter promoted to Account Manager in XXXX. As Account Manager, she handled herself professionally and provided outstanding service to our clients at all times.

During her term of employment, she was able to build excellent rapport with our key client, XXXX. She excelled in conceptualizing and executing several major key events which includes;

XXXX


I am confident of her innate ability to deliver results and coming up with resourceful solutions to problems. In the period schizogen reported to me, she was able to build up an excellent track record of more than 150% of her targeted sales. I saw schizogen not only develop on a professional basis but also on a personal basis. Her sharpened communication skills coupled with her personal development as a leader won her respect of colleagues alike.

It was a most profitable and enjoyable time working with schizogen. It is unfortunate that she decided to leave XXX and I know she felt my disappointment. Her departure was a loss to our organization and I will not hesitate to have her back again for it will only mean having a strong member on the team.

Sincerely,
my ex boss....

DIET!

Yes! Diet... Gen's @ it again... and i have a month... 30 days to make it into a lifestyle,into a habit... and so it goes.....

tarGET : tO SHED AWAY 6KG

HOW...

- no more sugared drinks.... h20, GREENTEA, tehOkosong peng

- slow decrease in carb intake... 50% of usual

- 1x salad lunch per week

- 1x wanton/dumpling soup/prawn soup

- 1x yong tau foo

- 1x chicken breat

- 1x fish soup

- no fats no skins

i try i try i try try....

ohmm.... ohmm......

dearie.... HELP!!!!!!

sorry dear dear

things to do...

there are jus so much to do before mid September arrives...and i tot its jus good to pen em down to be more focus

Work:
-Handover for all matters: By end of the week (done and F$%%ing cant wait to leave)
-China Claims (done)
-H.K Claims (done)
- Outstanding Claims (done)
-outstanding pay (done)

Personal
By Sunday
- Credit Card Bill Payment (done)
- Sub Card application (done)
- Repair my Mobile phone (done... thkx)
- Further clearance of wardrobe plan (done)
- Short Trip planning (cruise or what?) (done)
- Stack of forms to fill in (by august)
- Check status of graduation ceremony (done)
- 14 or 15? (done... 14th)
- 2 testi... (WIP, KT and LHC) (work on KTs) (done)
2 to chase..... (agreed KC, LHC,Outstanding: JTC)
Others:
- Room Re-org (left with wardrobe, small table and a lil more trash)
- Air Con repair (ok i don know what to do with the damn air con)
- Stella list of my room To Dos (done)
- Dad's new Suit (or at least a suit / photo details)
- Chars Gift ( done)

- Books to read (my yellow book)
- MICE blog and resources
- Read company information

- Exercise Regime
- diet regime
- Highlight my hair


NOTE:
before i accomplish the above, i shall play less of farmville...

of cos i know the list is a lot, but i also know tt deawei will be there to give me that gentle Ungentle push... hee hee... thk you so muchie.... muck

my dearest grandma

The 7 Steps to Developing Habits (part 2)

In part 1 of developing habits, I talked about associating good feelings towards desired actions. Can you associate good feelings towards taking the necessary actions to develop the desirable habit and still fail? Unfortunately, yes.

For some habits, creating those good feelings is all you need to do. For others, however, it will take a bit more planning. So here are ways that I’ve personally found effective in developing habits. Remember, once you create the habit, the hard part will be over. The challenge is just doing what you need to do long enough for it to become a habit. Tip: Go into this with a warrior’s mentality instead of a wimpy wishy washy one.

The 7 Steps to Developing Habits

1. Get clear on the end result of developing habits.
2. Develop strong enough reasons why you want the end result.
3. Educate yourself. Know what it really takes to form the habit.
4. Prepare to be attacked.
5. Get reinforcements.
6. Continue on the stairs until you reach the escalator.
7. It’s all maintenance from here.


Get Clear on the End Result
This may sound elementary but you must first know why you want to develop the habit in the first place. What is the end goal for having the habit? If the habit you want to develop is going to the gym every day, your end result could be to get down to a certain weight or be able to run a marathon or to reduce stress. Now the end result should be something that you can get excited about. Remember, a habit isn’t just something you will do a few times and never do again. It’ll be something you will consistently do until you decide to break it.

Develop Strong Enough Reasons
Once you know the end result, you must identify why you want it. You must have enough compelling reasons for doing this because if you don’t, you can easily become discouraged. Most of the time when people fail to achieve a goal they’ve set out, it’s because their reasons for achieving it wasn’t strong enough to help them endure the setbacks and obstacles. Therefore, it’s critically important that you have strong reasons for obtaining the end results because it will be the fuel that will drive your actions in forming the habits that will eventually make everything automatic.

Educate Yourself
You’ve got to know what it really takes. If you go into something blindly, chances are you will be faced with disappointment. Let’s say your goal is to lose weight. You set a goal to lose 50 pounds 3 months. Then you work on developing the habit of regular exercise and eating correctly. Problem is, you didn’t educate yourself enough to know what proper exercising and eating consists of.


So you go to the gym everyday and run your heart out and come home and eat foods you think is healthy. You also didn’t know what to expect, thinking you could probably lost 15 lbs a month every month. Two months pass and you’ve only lost 10 pounds, you always feel tired, and you’re starting to feel discouraged. If you had taken the time to educate yourself on proper exercise, dieting, and know what to expect, you’d still feel motivated and energized to keep at it. Don’t let this happen to you, be smart, and educate yourself.




Prepare to be Attacked

The greatest obstacle you’ll face in developing habits will come from your own “gremlins”. You know, the charming little voice in your head that comes up with about a dozen excuses to not take action. Persuasive little critters they are. Have you ever wanted to develop the habit of waking up at a certain time every morning? You know how it is right? The first few days might be a cinch. But about the end of the first week, you wake up at the right time, but on this day, something wakes up with you and starts a little sales pitch.


“Boy, it’s sure cold this morning. When did this blanket become so nice and warm? It’s still dark outside and everyone is still sleeping. My eyes and chest are still a bit heavy. I still feeling tired. If I wake up now, I might not have enough energy to last through the day, but if I just sleep a bit more, I’ll for sure have more energy later on. That dream I just had was so awesome, maybe if I close my eyes, I can go back to it. That’d be sweeeeeeet. Okay, just another 20 minutes, that’s just 2 snooze buttons. I’ll make it up tomorrow, I’ve done so well these past few days so I deserve a little reward…”


How many times have you had a similar experience? Some of you probably had this experience this morning! You see, this “gremlin” will be your biggest nemesis. Mainly because it knows you better than anyone else. It knows what makes you tick. It knows how to persuade you into doing what’s instantly gratifying instead of doing what you know will give you long term success. So how do we deal with this gremlin? You get prepared.


You know yourself best and you know the excuses you will come up with when you don’t feel like taking action. In those moments of weakness, if you’re not prepared, your gremlin will win. So here’s what to do. I’ve done this myself and it has worked very well.


Take out a piece of paper and start writing down any excuse you can think of that you know will eventually come up. Things like, “it’s too cold”, “I’ll just do it tomorrow”, “I don’t really feel like it”, “I haven’t seen any results yet, what’s the point”, “I just have to learn to love myself just the way I am”, etc. You get the point.


Next, write down ways to overcome these excuses. Know that these excuse making thought patterns is a habit. What you need to do is figure out a way to break them. For each excuse you’ve come up with on your list, write down one or more strategies to deal with it. You’ve got to anticipate these excuses/obstacles in advance and figure out a way to overcome them or set it up where they never come up.




Get Reinforcements


Find ways to remind yourself why you’re trying to develop habits. Examples:

Put your goal in writing where you can see it everyday.
Put a picture of the body you want with your face on it in front of your refrigerator.
Record a message to yourself telling yourself why you’ve got to keep going and listen to it daily.
If you have songs that just pump you up and get you going, listen to it.
Get support from friends and family members to help keep you accountable

The point of having reinforcements is that it’s so easy to get sidetracked. Having these things in front of you every day will remind you of your reasons why you must follow through.

Continue on the Stairs Until You Reach the EscalatorThe hardest part of developing habits is the actual developing stage. When something isn’t a habit yet, it will take focus and work. Do you think the people who have great looking physiques have to force themselves to go to the gym and eat right? No. Those activities have become a part of their life. I know this from experience. Only about a year and a half ago, I had to force myself to go to the gym. But once I’ve done it long enough, it just became a part of my life. Now, NOT going to the gym makes me feel like I’m missing something. It’s become a habit for me and is no longer a struggle. That’s the point you want to get to with any habit you want to develop, when NOT doing it makes you uncomfortable.


How long does it take to form a habit? Conventional wisdom says 21 – 30 days. It really depends on the habit from my experience. How long it takes really depends on how fast you can get to the point where it becomes effortless, but for practicality sake, set a goal to do it for at least 30 days, everyday. So your goal is to do take action on what you want to develop into a habit for 30 days so that it becomes a habit.

Regarding the 30 days, know that it’s okay to fail. You read correctly. Too many times people set a goal to develop a habit only to end up quitting just because on day 7 or whatever, they failed to follow through. It’s not all or nothing. If 30 days is too long, break it down. Do it for 7 days in a row, or 5 days, or 2 days. That’s not enough time to form a habit but it will give you confidence that if you can sustain the action for 2 days, you can do it for 5 days and 7 days and so on.


Or you can break it down activity wise. Let’s say you want to develop the habit of going to the gym. On day 4 you stumble. You used everything you could think of but that damn gremlin persuaded you to not go. Instead of beating yourself up, think of a different approach. If going to the gym and working for an hour for 30 days or even 5 days is too much, how about just develop the habit of just going to the gym without actually working out. If that is still too much, how about develop the habit of getting dressed and getting in your car. Now that might sound silly but trust me, it works. Eventually, you’ll be sitting in the car and just think, why don’t I just drive to the gym today. Gradually you’ll be able to work your way up to actually doing the workout. Keep it simple and take it one step at a time if you have to.

Once you’ve formed the habit, from this point….

It’s All Maintenance From Here
This is where you want to be at. This is what makes everything easy. Once you’ve developed the habit, it’ll no longer be a struggle. You will no longer have to force or motivate yourself to take action. It’ll be a part of your life. From here, all you have to do is maintain it. Depending on how strong the habit is, even if you stop say, going to the gym for a few weeks, your habit will eventually draw you back into going again. Now and then you might have to get back into a habit of doing something if you’ve stopped for too long perhaps due to some external circumstances like relocating and not having a gym near by, but don’t worry, the 2nd time around is a lot easier and takes less time.

Hopefully you found this posting to be helpful. One of my goals for this website is to provide you with tools to help you take action long enough to form these habits. The quotes, poems, videos, etc. are reinforcement tools to help you stay focused and motivated. So feel free to use them.

Until next time…

Love Life. Do Good. Live Well.



Read more: http://www.motivational-well-being.com/developing_habits.html#ixzz0O2wwDtJi

The 7 Steps to Developing Habits (part 1)

Developing Habits

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.” - Aristotle

How do you make doing something continually look easy? Using willpower to force yourself to do something will only last for so long. Motivation, willpower, self-discipline, these things are just tools to help you take the desired action, but they require constant effort and work.

So what's the answer? By developing habits that make your actions automatic. The goal is to get yourself to do something long enough until it becomes a habit. Once it becomes a habit, you don’t have to put much effort into it anymore. It’ll almost be automatic, and that’s the beauty of creating habits that align with your goals and dreams.

In this post about developing habits, I will mainly focus on creating new empowering habits opposed to how to break old disempowering ones. First, let’s take a look at how habits are formed.

Why We Form Bad Habits

If you think about it, habits are relatively simple to develop. Look at all the habits you don’t like. Now let me ask you, did you have to work hard at developing the habit of overeating or watching too much TV, or sleeping too much, or smoking? Of course not. You just did it long enough, through repitition, until it became a habit. Why did you keep doing it though?

If you examine your undesirable habits closely, you will find that they all have something in common. They all give you some type of feeling that is rewarding to you. Why do people spend hours watching mindless television? Why do people who smoke smoke? They do it because it gives them a certain feeling, in this case, relaxation, stress reduction, or even excitement.

You see, we’re not addicted to the actual activity. What we’re addicted to is the feeling that activity gives us. Just think of any habit you have that you find undesirable. What positive feelings does it give you? Know that you’re getting a “reward” for those bad habits, that’s why you continue doing it. We don’t do things habitually that makes us feel bad, at least not at the moment that we’re engaged in doing it.

For example, you might overeat and feel bad afterwards, but while you were eating, you probably had a big smile on your face as you licked the juicy BBQ sauce off your fingers. Same goes with smoking. You might keep saying to yourself you’re going to quit after you just smoked, but while you were smoking you were probably just enjoying the state of relaxation.


This is the main reason why people set a goal of developing a good habit, such as regular exercise, and fail. They associate bad feelings to it instead of good ones. So how do we associate good feelings? Just think of disciplining a child. If you want a child to do something without forcing them, you reward them, give them something that makes them feel good. So the secret is to find a way to associate good feelings to the activity you want to develop as a habit. There are lots ways to accomplish this. Here are some ideas.

Ways to Create the Good Feeling

Reward yourself immediately after you’ve taken action.- You want to give yourself something that will make you feel good, something that you normally wouldn’t do. Just make sure it doesn’t contradict the habit you’re trying to create. Don’t reward yourself by binging on fatty foods if your habit is to eat healthier foods obviously.

Focus on the end result. - Why do you want to create this habit in the first place? Think about the feelings you would get if your habit was already developed.

Think about the consequences of NOT following through. - Create and associate pain to not following through. Imagine where you’d be years down the road if you don’t create this habit.

Imagine where you’d be 6 months, a year, 3 years from today if this habit is now a part of you.

Think about what feelings you’re looking for and find other things you can do that give you the same feeling and combine them. - For example, if the habit you’re trying to create is to workout everyday and the feeling you get is a feeling of power and confidence and you happen to have a particular song that when you listen to gives you that sensation, listen to it while you workout.

So now that you’ve found out some ways to associate some good feelings to engaging in the habit you want to develop, you’re all set right? Not quite. Unlike bad habits, good habits take focus and work to develop. Why? Bad habits give you instant gratification, while developing good habits usually don’t. Most of the time, you’re going to need to push and motivate yourself to perform the actions you’re trying to develop into a habit.

Habits to kick off

A great observer once shared these with me....

Habits... that one will be better w/o

1. Picking food the moment one get home
2. not taking a shower immediately
3. lying in a bad position after food
4. occasions where u don remove your contact lens
5. not exercising
6. overeating... and getting fat
7. not moisturizing enuff

.....